Eating disorders: Information for parents and friends

Does my son/daughter have an eating disorder? What should i do if my child has an eating disorder? and what can i do to prevent my child developing an eating disorder??

A lot of this information is aimed directly at parents but can be related to friendships also.

If you think your child may have an eating disorder it is important that you take note of various signs and symptoms such as (but to name but a few); a preoccupation with appearance, irritability, anxiety, depression, changing clothes often before deciding upon an outfit, becoming introverted, weight loss, and increase in food intake, weight gain, frequent vomiting, and self deprecating comments.

It is every parent’s worst nightmare to see their child suffer, however feeling guilt and being self consumed with your own regrets will not solve anything, and in fact it will most likely make things worse. This is because the eating disorder is in most cases a cry for attention. Firstly blaming yourself takes the attention away from them, causing destructive behaviour to develop further. Also feeling sad because of guilt actually inflicts guilt upon your child. This aids in the manifestation of disordered eating patterns.

The next thing to do would be to have a look at the underlying causes of eating disorders ( ), understanding why your child has developed disordered eating is essential in order to rectify the problem. There are many causes and in most cases a few simultaneously contribute to feelings of inadequacy and self loathing.

Also by reading the section on causes of eating disorders, you will gain an understanding (if you didn’t already know) of the psychological aspect to eating disorders. Most people think that an eating disorder is about vanity, weight loss and attention. An attention plea is sometimes the case; however the weight loss or gain is only a symptom of the bigger picture. An eating disorder is about control. Your child may feel that the world outside is out of their conscious control and thus gain gratification by attempting control the world inside (for example, weight).

By forcibly trying to control their behaviours take more control away from them, increasing their desire to gain mastery over their body.

By keeping things as normal as possible you are decreasing the risk of resentment towards you, also allowing for an environment that can (when they are ready), aid in the nurturing themselves once again. It will also increase the likely hood that your child will open up and talk to you about their emotions. You cannot fix it...it’s important to remember that all be it a destructive one, it is a learning curve and a journey...allow them to self search a little while...and in the mean time figure out why they are behaving this way.

It is also important to note that weight gain, increased food intake or eating at strange times for example may also be an indication of an eating disorder such as binge eating (which is also damaging to health and emotionally difficult to cope with). Secondly, take a look at some of the eating disorders listed on this website and see which of the signs and symptoms best relate to your child.

If your child is indeed suffering from an eating disorder, it does not mean that it is your fault. There are many causes and influences upon which eating disorders can develop.

Available here

A hugely important aspect when trying to help your son/daughter or friend, is to keep the relationship as normal as possible.....almost as if they have no issues with their food at all. I know it sounds crazy...your probably all thinking “WHAT?? How do I stand by and let my child hurt themselves!!” However, entering a power struggle over food, trying to control your child or simply attempt to MAKE them eat is the worst possible thing you could do.

Eating disorders: Information for parents and friends

BraveSpace

Forums

Usefull sites and contacts