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Thank you anon. Your so lovely giving your time and sound advice si willingly. I think other people will really benefit from your comments. Its fantastic to have an outside opinion and i gotta say your comments really help me to regain perspective. I keep reading them all to keep myself going. Tonight i'm feeling more positive and fuled to do this mainly because of what you have shared.

Thank you! your awesome! xxx

Hi :)

Please don't let weeks like that get you down- they're going to happen- it's only natural for a recovery process to have it's downs, but you need to keep going. Look at how far you've come and how motivated you've been since the start of the process- it takes a lot of strength to do that- and one week isn't going to set that all back to square one, so don't worry too much. Just try and put the bad week out of your mind and pretend that you're continuing on from the previous week, if that makes sense? Maybe you're putting too much pressure on yourself and that's what's causing things to go off track a bit? You're trying to balance uni and your job and your own recovery, as well as trying not to disappoint other people. That's a lot for anyone to have to deal with at one time, and when you give yourself so much to focus on, it's normal for things to get a bit overwhelming. Make sure that you allow yourself time to do things you enjoy and things that make you relax- when you're stressed out, it's a lot easier to fall deeper into the eating disorder mindset. Remember that you're not happy when you're like this- it sounds so simple and stupid- but it's easy to forget. Because bulimia is a mental disorder, it can not, and will not, bring you genuine happiness, and I'm sure you're well aware of that already, but just always keep your longterm goal in mind, and before doing something like bingeing/purging/skipping meals etc, just ask yourself if it's going to help you with your goal for the future, whatever that may be (like happiness/full recovery/success or whatever)- of course, that's not going to work, most of the time due to the complexities of mindset that eating disorders induce, but maybe once in a while, it might help, if that makes any sense at all.

Just to add, I really respect how brave you are- openly sharing your emotions and thoughts and feelings. It's actually quite inspiring- it's probably helping a lot of people to see someone they can identify with- so well done for that! :)

Bless ya my friend, youve come so far, never be too hard on yourself dude, like you say you do so many good things, your job etc :) you have no need to worry bout losing your friends. you have so many good, real good friends, who arent going anywhere my friend. we know your going through this and we understand, its not a chore being your friend, its a pleasure! its a pleasure and a joy to be your friend. never give up, you have such a bright future, your so intelligent and so motivated, theres no limit of how far you could go with your career, honest truth my friend.

honestly no need to worry, you know your friend will always be by your side, to care and for a massive great big hug, forever! because we want to be, because your our friend, a great friend :)

We all want happiness

and dread the thought of rain.

When the sun fails to shine,

we worry and complain.

For if we're always happy

filled with sunshine and cheer,

our hearts would hold no mercy

for others who've shed tears.

So when trouble comes knocking,

remember to stay strong.

Rainbows always follow the storm

and dark clouds never stay long.

love, now and always, your friend x i hope this message finds you well xx

You are are good friend!! :) belimic or not you will always be a great friend! and no ones dissapointed with you! Its understandable that it must be extremely hard to achieve what you are trying to, don't be so hard on yourself :) you will get there in the end, you've come a long way, love ya x x x x

Hi, Just wanted to say I am following your videos and even though you are struggling now it's really great how far you have come. I know what it feels like to be stuck - I have Anorexia and I know that eating is the way for me to get energy to improve my life but I hate the feeling of having food inside me. It's like there is two sides of me - one with all the plans on how I can get my life back on track (I've only recently been able to make plans that are positive so I guess it's a step in the right direction!) but the other side of me just wants to lose weight (she is winning as well at the moment) Thanks for making these videos - I can see some of them were made when you were having a difficult time so it must take some courage to talk about that to us.

Well done on the job too - I hope one day very soon I am able to get a small job and go back to college and then onto University - well done you for having those positive things in your life :).

I look forward to your next video. Stay strong x

so beautiful what you did for your little man with the magic dust, i'l have to remember that one, hes a very lucky to have you. you can see the love in his eyes when he looks up to his big sister x